Feelings

There are six main feelings: Anger, Sadness, Happiness, Fear, Guilt and Loneliness. Following is an extensive list. See if you can identify the feelings you have right now: 

Positive                                              Negative

Happy                                                                                      Sad

Positive                                                                                    Negative

Blissful                                                                                     Disappointed

Confident                                                                                 Ashamed

Interested                                                                                 Anxious

Satisfied                                                                                   Horrified

Relieved                                                                                   Jealous

Content                                                                                    Guilty

Surprised                                                                                  Frightened

Indifferent                                                                                 Exhausted

Comfortable                                                                             Frustrated

Warm                                                                                       Lonely

Joyous                                                                                      Hurt

Calm                                                                                        Stressed

Peaceful                                                                                   Regretful

Relaxed                                                                                    Suspicious

Hopeful                                                                                    Desperate

Confident                                                                                 Angry

Tender                                                                                     Enraged

Grateful                                                                                    Pain

Brave                                                                                       Cautious

Strong                                                                                      Weak

Witty                                                                                        Worried

Alive                                                                                        Tired

Cherished                                                                                  Dejected

Fulfilled                                                                                    Bored

Feelings are simply energy in your body. Some feelings are associated with greater energy. For example, anger can hold a lot of energy. So can anxiety. Anyone who has ever had a panic attack is familiar with the emotional energy involved. Feelings don’t kill us. They are there to inform us, help us make choices and decisions and solve problems. It’s okay to feel your feelings. You can feel intense anger and not take out that anger on anyone. You can feel intense sadness and still go to your art class. You can feel fear but drive across the bridge anyway.

Feel the energy within your body, notice it, acknowledge it (“ah, there’s that sadness welling up again”), and then take appropriate action. You may choose not to act. You may confront someone. You may decide it’s time to set a boundary. You may take some deep breaths. Perhaps you will punch a pillow, go for a brisk walk, or phone a friend to talk about it. 

Feelings are directly related to our thoughts. Often we don’t realize what we were thinking before a feeling is aroused, but there are always some thoughts that precede our feelings. The next time you are feeling sad, angry or afraid, ask yourself, “What was I thinking about a few minutes ago? An hour ago? This morning or last night?” Begin to connect your thoughts with your feelings. Recognise that what we think creates how we feel. Think in a negative way and create negative feelings. Think positively and create positive feelings.

If we change our thoughts to be more positive, rational, and soothing, our feelings will also become more positive. Try it next time you are feeling any of the negative feelings. Instead of continuing with the negative stream of thoughts, think of an alternative thought. For example ask yourself: “Is there a different perspective I could take on this situation that would be kinder and gentler to me?” Speak to yourself as though you were speaking to a friend who was having the same problem as you. Tell your friend how you see it differently. Cheer yourself up! Find the words to tell yourself so that your emotional state changes.